Like an exam without a question…

A variety of things happened this week, none of which I can disclose here in any detail. But it’s all left me feeling ruffled and uneasy. By the time I finished breakfast this morning, I felt slightly unwell. Just the kind of unwell you might feel if you were very nervous. But I have nothing to be nervous about. Later, as I walked the dog, this image came to me and I jotted it on my phone. I don’t think it is accessible on its own. It’s a description of a feeling. But it could be a dream.

     A pack of cards tossed casually     
        so they riff and ripple on the floor -   
an upbeat medley of colours, numbers & faces -              
                    but messy.  So messy. 
                             Behind me an alarm is sounding         
         chiming and high-pitched.  Over and over.    
                      It's something to do with the faces       
       those stiff royal smiles - his mace,    
                             her unnatural hair. 
                  Relax,   I tell myself.           
                             But the chiming grinds at my neck   
           and I'm rolling my head     
      and shrugging my shoulders 
                     and staring.  
            Trying to figure it out -   the link. 
                          Cards.  Alarm.      
          The numbers are spinning now       
           spinning like pinwheels 
                   red and black     
    merging and flowering        
          hurting, sickening, deafening. 
            I wrench my eyes away     
  to the floor tiles        
         their comforting tessellation,   
            somebody else's order. 
               The chiming goes on and on and on.                        

What do you think? Does it stand on its own?

4 thoughts on “Like an exam without a question…

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