Weather Vane

My dark mood reflected in the day
gentle currawongs mourn with the crying rain
crows pull at the sodden carcase
a road-kill rabbit stretched and grey.

Gentle currawongs mourn. With the crying rain
a background rhythm. Insistent drums.
Road-kill rabbit stretched and grey
like the dull road and the castigated sky.

A background rhythm.  Insistent drums.
Dead trees in balletic shapes upflung.
Like the dull road and in the castigated sky,
clouds gilted auburn from tumult within.

Dead trees in balletic shapes upflung
crows pull at the sodden carcase.
Clouds gilted auburn from tumult within -
my dark mood reflected in the day.

This is a pantoum written for Peter’s dVerse Challenge – “Coming Full Circle”

36 thoughts on “Weather Vane

  1. Another pantoum for this prompt – marvellous – Great use of the form for a tour through a grey sodden day/mood. I particularly liked ‘Dead trees in balletic shapes upflung’ – such a wonderful verb – and that last stanza just hinting at some lifting of mood – the gilt clouds. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You pulled off this pantoum well, avoiding monotony by carefully varying the lines to create a scene of darkness and decay with some beautiful highlights. Had to look up ‘currawong’ – you don’t get them round here!

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  3. Your pantoum is atmospheric and appeals to the senses with the currawongs mourning with the crying rain and the ‘sodden carcase’ of the ‘road-kill rabbit stretched and grey’ like the road and the day; the use of caesura and short phrases slows the reading down and stretches it out. I love the use of sound and visual imagery in the lines:
    ‘A background rhythm. Insistent drums.
    Dead trees in balletic shapes upflung.’

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  4. I will be the first to admit that I didn’t even know what a pantoum was even though I have unwittingly written them. What sort of charlatan does that make me! A poet who can’t tell his pants from his pantoum! Also had to look up currawong, so thanks for the education on both fronts!
    This is a very downbeat poem for you, but I don’t mean that in any derogatory sense. You captured your grey mood perfectly. I particularly liked the penultimate line.

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  5. I love the dark imageries that course here; very gothic and it delves into how that mood truly impacts the narrator. Beautifully penned, I always enjoy reading your work.

    Liked by 1 person

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