as I drove I saw a mood in colour the clouds took on the shades of autumn leaves puffy and rouged tinged with bronze against a canvas of washing-day blue the leaves themselves became ruddy lanterns warming softly the light and in the distance the sky glowered school uniform grey thick as a duffle coat to infinity and beyond as though this place and now were hope in a storm
Written for Mish’s dVerse Prompt “Go ahead, Make my day” in which she asks us to pick from a selection of lines from movies and weave our chosen quote into a poem. I chose “to infinity and beyond” from Toy Story
You managed to make the most mundane reading sentences, into a joy.
Iβm head over heels for the line; school uniform grey.
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oh thank you! my primary school had a grey jumper and it just fit. goodness knows, there are a thousand shades of grey but hopefully school uniforms don’t use all of them. π
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I like the image of the leaves as “ruddy lanterns.” The contrasts are beautiful with the “duffle coat” sky. I can feel your moody afternoon in vivid detail, great write! π
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Many thanks. Lovely comment! π
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I honestly feel like the color-image-concepts you wove together in this poem are beyond my ability to imagine, let alone incorporate into verse.
β€
David
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Is that good or bad? I mean the fact that you can’t imagine them? Does that mean the poem doesn’t create a picture for you? Just need clarification, sorry. π
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It means (sorry I wasn’t clear) that I feel that your images were beyond my ability to come up with – creative in a way that I am not.
β€
David
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Oh okay. π Sorry. That’s very kind. I have been blown away by the lovely comments on this poem.
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Excellent!π
Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPhone
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The descriptive phrases you used are breathtaking ……
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Thank you!!
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Aww, this is such a gentle piece, so rich in language and imagery. The quote really snuck up on me, blending in so well.
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Thank you!! ππ
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some great descriptions reflecting much of what I saw yesterday: the ‘rouged clouds’ , the ‘sky glowered school uniform grey’ only I wouldn’t have put it good as you π
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Thank you, John. You’re very kind. π
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You’ve conjured a visual masterpiece with every wordstroke.
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Wow! Thank you! Everyone is being so lovely!
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When it’s good it’s good π
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I love this nostalgia-inducing poem, which took me back to the autumn term, going back to school in my stiff, itchy new uniform. The use of colour is deft, especially βwashing-day blueβ, and evocative, and these lines made me smile:
βthe leaves themselves
became ruddy lanternsβ
and
βthe sky glowered
school uniform grey
thick as a duffle coatβ.
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Thank you, Kim. That’s so cool that my images made such a picture for you. π You have made me very happy. π
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I love your imagery here, especially
‘the sky glowered
school uniform grey
thick as a duffle coat’
Reminds me of my school days back in grey old Blighty!
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Thank you! So glad it struck a chord. π
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Lovely poem, some gorgeous turns of phrase: autumn leaves puffy and rouged / against a canvas of washing-day blue / the sky glowered school uniform grey, thick as a duffle coat. π
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Thank you so much. Glad you liked it. π
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Love how you made the weather part of your day in such a strong way… school uniform grey says it all for me.
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Thanks. π
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