suppose you visit me down here you could discard your mirrors in this unlit cascade this fetish of dirt the rub, the writhe segments and soil the dirt and I we are mutually incorporating - in and out the same simple magnificence
Earthworm
Published
Twists and turns in a way that attracts and disgusts. Love it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I like
“unlit cascade
this fetish of dirt”
It gives the poem an almost party atmosphere.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes. That was kind of the intention. From responses so far, I don’t think the poem has really worked. I wrote it rather quickly. And chemo brain means I am often a bit kooky in my thinking. So it might need a rethink later.
LikeLiked by 1 person
p.s. I’m not surprised you wrote about worms 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love this! I wouldn’t change anything as it is descriptive and beautifully put.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Carol! ❤️
LikeLike
amazing: virtually an ode of the earthworm 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, thanks John! So glad you like it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I also expected a ‘worms’ poem given your pen-name, and you didn’t disappoint! The ‘simple magnificence’ of dirt calls to mind Hamlet’s ‘quintessence of dust.’
LikeLiked by 1 person
I guess I have more of an affinity with worms than I realized. 🙂 I tried for cabbage moths (a lot around at the moment) but found I didn’t have a lot to say.
Dirt is magnificent. It is the beginning and the end of the life cycle. Perhaps that’s why I think worms are so cool.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I think they are underrated and underestimated! Perhaps because they live beneath us 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
this is such a kids chant about worms, you make them sound both disgusting and exciting!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wonderful! I don’t care if earthworms aren’t really capable of thought, this makes me believe they are.
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂 Thanks, Jane
LikeLiked by 1 person
Down to earth excellence! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
👍
LikeLiked by 1 person
“the dirt and I
we are mutually
incorporating –
in and out the same
simple magnificence”
– I just love the simple brilliance of this
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh thank you! People have made lots of nice comments but I wasn’t really sure what they understood from the poem. Your comment feels like I know you know what I was driving at. 😂😂. No offence to others. It’s just one of those things of sending your little baby artling out into the world and letting people interpret it.
LikeLike
Hey, how did your sermon go? 🤞🤞 For you!!!
LikeLike
Giving it tomorrow. Need to finish it today. I managed to tone down the toxic positivity tangent, so it is improved, but still needs some work. Thanks for the well wishes and support!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oooh… this is wonderful! I love that middle stanza, “the fetish of dirt”
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Kate!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I absolutely love this! discard your / mirrors in this // unlit cascade …Such a great line.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Bob! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
“this fetish of dirt / the rub, the writhe” – I could really feel the earthiness in that! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLike
I’ve always hated worms….maybe from when my dad used to make me put them on the hook at the end of my fishing pole when I was young? Yech!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well I always hated fishing. Watching the poor fish jump on the end of the hook made me feel so mean. I guess putting worms on hooks is no kinder. I really should be vegetarian.
LikeLike
Worms have always intrigued me, and I learned very early how good they were for the soil, but I do remember that I never took the challenge from the other boys to eat one.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I don’t recommend starting now.
LikeLike