A raindrop in a cloud thinks that’s life, floating there in sagacious blue, fraternising with other raindrops and the blessing of the sun. Floating there on the ratty, tatty edge of nothing at all. Not knowing of rain. Not knowing of its imminent fall.
Then, quite suddenly, there’s swirling and grinding and the cloud’s in a hurling. The raindrop is tumbled, such swiftness of temper. Voice gruff as dolomite, thunder comes raging and all around is the big sound of tearing. Lightning’s foul stripping, clouds ripped and dripping and then the inevitable tipping.
And now truth is the way of a zipper, an arrow of downness, a splatter like bird turd. The raindrop is haggard and tattered and more just a smear on the smut of the pavement. Feeling abandoned, jettisoned, weepy, the poor little droplet is sagged out and seepy.
blossoms fall as spring’s coil stretches summer’s trees are full of gone
liking the image of the raindrop being somehow independent of the cloud.
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Thanks!
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I pondered this comment as I walked this morning. And I thought of how a stitch makes a part of knitting. And I pictured the cloud unraveling – the pull of gravity’s thread. And I wondered too if you watched a cloud for long enough – perhaps with some time lapse photography – could you see it shrink? A garment undone? I fear you have inspired another poem.
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Or, what makes a raindrop decide to join one cloud and not another?
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Indeed! Are clouds like vacuum bags… each with their own hoses?
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and maybe every now and then, they capture a disagreeable raindrop, and feel the need to spit it out?
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Or perhaps rain signifies mutiny on board!
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or a cat with a furball?
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LOL I like that one. Does make me think about what we’re collecting in our water tank though.
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🤣
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I like the rhyming, aliteration and onomatopoeia in the prose and then you finish the haiku with a knockout line. Very clever.👏
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Thanks, Hobbo! 🙂
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👍
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I really enjoyed this. Especially the last line, summer’s trees are full of gone. Fantastic!
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Thanks Bob. I love it when I’m half way through a piece of writing and then something happens in my life – completely irrelevant – but somehow it gives me the ending I need. I said to my daughter “I went out to tell your brother it’s bed time and he’s gone. Daddy’s gone. And the Fiat’s gone. The garage is full of gone.” And there it was. My ending. But don’t worry. They all returned in due course.
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That’s awesome What a great way to find an ending. And it certainly worked out, cause the ending was really terrific.
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This so good! The rhyming and alliteration work so well, and it’s such a novel point of view.
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Thanks, Kate!
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